Umm Anthony, Words Mean Everything.

“Can't tell you nothing you ain't already heard
No matter what I say it's nothing but words
Just let me prove to you what I know is real
Let me express to you the way that I feel”
~ Anthony David, Words.

I think Anthony is full of shit. If it were “nothing but words” then why is it taking me so long to crank out the mere 1,400 words of sweet nothings designed to woo my way into the gracious hearts of various graduate admissions committees across the country? How do I finesse their minds in such a way that they would be willing to over look my low GRE scores, and my first two years I bullshited my way through college which resulted in me having less then stellar grades. Yeah, it’s true that I more than made them up by doing phenomenally well the last three years while working nearly 30 hours per week and attending school, but hasn’t every other candidate been through something similar??

It’s simply taking me forever to write a personal statement and statement of purpose for my graduate applications. It hasn’t taken me months, weeks, or days but years. Three years of looking for the right words to say that “I am passionate about journalism,” and “fluck those other candidates- I am what you are looking for.”

Not to mention the fact that Rabiah doesn’t want to go to just ANY school (raising pinky to lip), she has to go to one of the best an Ivy League preferably, or she doesn’t want to go. I am so working on being a little more humble, and being okay with going to a tier two school. At the moment though, I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I am striving for the best.

I didn’t want to come at them with the same sob story that most minorities have when they grew up poor. Yeah, the streets were hard, that’s why I couldn’t go out in them. I was sheltered so to speak. My high school was over crowed, didn’t have adequate books or enough teachers who cared. However, my teachers did care, I was in Advanced Placement classes and I had been taking additional community college courses since I was 15. I think they’ve read enough of those.

I could talk about my experience in the field, but my resume does that already.

Over achiever? Not really. Hard worker? Definitely. It’s the story of my life.

Ironically enough, the only thing that is really holding me back is my lack of confidence in my own writing.

Though I want to be a full-time journalist, I don’t consider myself a writer. To me a writer is someone who loves the science of written words. Writers paint pictures with words. Punctuation, grammar, sentence structure, are like paint brushes and a new Microsoft Word document is a canvas. They can invent phrases and invoke emotion. I love reading real writers, my friends the Golden Girls-Nakia, Syn, Britt, Lola, Dayna, in fact are amongst the best. Reading their work along with other writers such as Phellah G, Justin, JaySpace, We All Like Things, and One Man Gang, tells me I’ve got lots of work to do.

I can write too, I just wouldn’t say that a “real writer” is who I am. I don’t write because I love the craft of writing. I write because I like to talk, and inform people. I write to debate and discuss issues. I write so people can understand where I am coming from. I am not stringent about grammar and punctuation. It doesn’t bother me when people don’t stick to conventional standard forms of writing. Just don’t use large vocabulary words incorrectly and we won’t have any issues. Lol

I just want people to hear my voice and understand where I am coming from. The admissions committee wants to see evidence of a solid command of the written language. I don’t have an elegant prose to pen. My writing style is straight forward. I write the way I speak, revised.

Is it enough? Is it okay that I won’t be the next Maya Angelou or Toni Morrison? Sigh. Hopefully tomorrow I’ll have more ideas to write this statement from hell. These words that mean everything. As for now, my pillow awaits.

Sang It, Sol-Angel... That's Good Music

People let’s get it together...

All of this talk about Beyonce and her two new mediocre videos, whether good or bad it is really annoying. There is nothing spectacular about either one “If I were a Boy” (a seemingly deeper version of Ciara's Like A Boy) or “Single Ladies.” They are catchy, typically Beyonce songs- nothing new. Had anyone else sung it there would not be all of this talk about it.

It’s not the mere mention of her that is putting me on fire per se, but rather the fact that her sister Solange’s album has been over looked and under rated and she produced an incredible album this year...

“Sol-Angel & the Hadley St. Dreams.”

...While Beyonce’s new singles are blowing up the music world.

Now I too, was reluctant to embrace anything Solange because I personally hate singing families. It’s not illegal - I know, but everybody in the family isn’t talented always. In cases when they are it’s like, so what they can all sing? Not all of them were meant to be singers. Pick a representative and do it moving.

However, because I love music I had to at least listen to what she had to sing before I started critiquing and criticizing the family decision to let her have another album. So while sitting at work, I listened to a few snippets on itunes and fell in love. Not only with the album but also with the fact that it was being sold for the bargain price of $7.99. I mean, how many times have you gotten a great album for a great price (illegal downloading excluded)?

My favorites on the album include…

Cosmic Journey

Sandcastle Disco

Would Have Been The One

Even though I can (and have) listen to the whole album over and over.

Feel Free to listen…




In my opinion, that album should have blown up by now. Get it together people and listen to some GOOD music.


Thanks For Reading.

Tarzan and Focus: Natural Home Disasters

I came home today and my kitchen curtain wasn’t where I left it. Instead of hanging from the brackets that have been holding them up since I moved in here (about 3 years ago) my ray of light hider was sitting on the kitchen floor. How am I supposed to walk around my house naked now? Huh?! I am pissed.

Now, I didn’t do it. I was at work. So the only other two other folks in my house during working hours are these two here:

Tarzan Jenkins and Prince Focus Abdul Jamaal

Both of them are going to get put out soon, they just don’t know it yet.

They have really been cutting up since I took them to the vet last Saturday. They got their shots and I got yelled at by the vet. Apparently, one of my babies, Focus, is too chunky (don’t call him fat, I’ll choke you all, he’s just a little thick) and has to go on a diet.

What I don’t understand is why is he eating so much? Am I stressing him out? It’s not like I am feeding them wet food. They get their Iams dry kitten food, but Focus acts like I am feeding him steak or something.

Tell me how the H-E-double hockey sticks, am I supposed to put ONE cat on a diet?

Anywho, I don’t want him to die or anything like that, so I cut back on the amount of food he gets everyday.

Guess what?! This cat is retaliating!!!!!!!!!!

Do you know this kigga’s going through the trash? Sleeping during the day so he can keep me up at night while running around the house? Hell, even his brother has left his sour ass alone. I am not a punk though.

I got him exercising and everything. Everyday when I get home, I take the broom and chase him around the house with it for 30 minutes. “Run Focus! Run!” I say. I don’t think he appreciates it much.

Tarzan looks at his brotha like, “man I told you not to eat that second helping,” while Focus is like “This B!tch is Crazy!!!!!!!!!! Don’t just stand there, SAVE ME!!!!”

It’s not my fault the doctor put him on a diet. He shouldn’t have been such a piglet. Since I’ve been such an neglectful mommy, I’ve got to show the vet I can be a drill sergeant. They’ll be anorexic in no time.

Now if only I could be as discipline with myself as I am with my twins.
Sigh, Wish me luck.

Thanks for reading.